best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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