This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
