it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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