fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
