no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
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It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
your like the ambassador to my penis.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
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he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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