WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
