So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
