think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
