omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
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i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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