He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
