I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
