Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize