love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
