mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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