About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
