too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
