Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
