In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
