He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
