THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
