i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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