Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
