I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
