her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
