I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
The best revenge is premature balding
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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