I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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