he told me I talked like a deaf person
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Maybe he injected his testicle?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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