THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Randomize