Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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