He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
