The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
