Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize