Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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