I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
These tits shall not be calmed
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
