Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I don't deserve a penis
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
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