Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)

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(310): Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :) http://tfl.nu/0k31

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(940): View more from Texas

I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl

(1-940): View more from Texas

you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.

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(940): I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl (1-940): you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent. http://tfl.nu/wzvk

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(914): View more from New York

you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped

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(914): you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped http://tfl.nu/cz84

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(217): View more from Illinois

I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?

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(217): I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college? http://tfl.nu/03bi

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(404): View more from Georgia

It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.

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(404): It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated. http://tfl.nu/7ila

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(330): View more from Ohio

i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.

(614): View more from Ohio

My vagina agrees.

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(330): i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again. (614): My vagina agrees. http://tfl.nu/ii41

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?

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(832): Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions? http://tfl.nu/z9u9

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(843): View more from South Carolina

Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..

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(843): Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming.. http://tfl.nu/kfd5

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.

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(715): I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names. http://tfl.nu/wmoo

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(601): View more from Mississippi

i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.

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(601): i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this. http://tfl.nu/9qd9

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(847): View more from Illinois

My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.

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(847): My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan. http://tfl.nu/ww9p

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(651): View more from Minnesota

Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever

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(651): Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever http://tfl.nu/sex2

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.

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(610): You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now. http://tfl.nu/4au1

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(864): View more from South Carolina

Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.

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(864): Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you. http://tfl.nu/7af4

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(770): View more from Georgia

Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?

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(770): Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right? http://tfl.nu/rafd

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