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Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
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