Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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