I want to make a zoo with you.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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