I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
