A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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