I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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