girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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