Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
