his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize