hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
