We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
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all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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