Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
