My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
The fabulous human disaster: it is him