My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
