the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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