No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
