he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize